Young Menifee Cancer Survivor Awaits Special Meeting

Tristen Crouser, 11-year-old Menifee resident and cancer survivor, enjoys time around the pool with his dog Lily.

In a quiet neighborhood in the Rustlers Ranch neighborhood of Menifee, 11-year-old Tristen Crouser teaches his dog Lily how to fetch a ball from the swimming pool. He smiles as he shows a reporter his guinea pig, Sarah. Then he jumps on his quad and races down the street in front of his house, beaming from ear to ear.

More than 5,600 miles away in Berlin, Germany, a woman named Ines Borck is as excited to meet Tristen and his family as they are to meet her. Borck is the one who saved Tristen's life.

About a month from now, Tristen and his family are scheduled to fly to Berlin to meet Borck for the first time. She does not speak English, and their emails have to be translated to be understood. But they have exchanged photos and their bond is undeniable.

"I told Tristen I gave him life the first time and she's given him life the second time," said Tristen's mother, Monique Crouser, her eyes filled with tears. "Without her, he wouldn't be here."

Much has been written and broadcast about Tristen, who became the first childhood cancer victim from Menifee to receive widespread media attention. Diagnosed with leukemia at age 2, he has spent more than 900 days in Loma Linda Hospital and other medical centers over the last 8 1/2 years. Twice doctors told his parents he wouldn't live more than a few weeks.

When Tristen relapsed for the second time in the fall of 2009, Rick and Monique Crouser were told to make funeral arrangements.

"We actually took a trip out to Forest Lawn because they told us to start planning ... that he wouldn't make it through Christmas," Monique Crouser said. "He was sent home on hospice. But soon after, we got a call he was in remission long enough that we had a three-week window to do a (bone marrow) transplant."

Borck was one of three people identified from the international bone marrow registry that were a potential match. Further testing showed Borck -- the mother of a son a little older than Tristen -- was a perfect match.

After an agonizing wait for Tristen's heart to become strong enough for the transplant, Borck gave herself daily shots to prepare for the transplant and went through three separate procedures to produce enough bone marrow to be shipped to California. On Jan. 14, 2010, Tristen Crouser began his new life.

"Ines went (to the hospital) three different times because they have to harvest so many hundreds of thousands of cells," Monique Crouser said. "Before that, she was literally sticking herself with a needle every day to prepare her system. I was so afraid she wouldn't keep going back and going through that, but she put her life on hold for this procedure.

"This is a once in a lifetime thing, to meet her."

Tristen, smiling from under the helmet he wears while riding his quad, shares a moment with his mother Monique.

The Crousers have been invited to Germany by officials at DKMS, a foundation dedicated to the eradication of blood cancer with offices in Germany, Poland, Spain, the United Kingdom and the United States. According to its website, DKMS was created in 1990 by the family of a German woman named Mechtild Harf, who died while trying to find a bone marrow donor.

DKMS in Germany has established May 28 as a national day of recognition of bone marrow donors in that nation. Five families of recipients of German bone marrow donors have been invited to Germany for the public awareness event, including the Crousers.

According to Monique Crouser, DKMS has arranged to pay for two air fares and hotel accommodations for the trip, but says she couldn't make the trip without the entire family, including her husband Rick and 13-year-old son Kodee.

"It's a family affair," she said. "Rick and I will both go with Tristen and Kodee is 13; I would not leave him home alone. We have all been through this together."

Monique estimates that the family will need to raise at least $6,000 to finance its share of the trip. Two online fundraising accounts have been created in support of the Crousers: a youcaring account and a gofundme account.

A number of other fundraisers are being planned in the community to help make possible Tristen's meeting with Ines Borck. A pancake breakfast May 10 at Applebee's will raise funds for the effort, as well a garage sale at the Crouser resident the weekend of May 15-17.

Those wishing to donate items for the garage sale should call 951-255-2005.

If enough donations are raised, Tristen and his parents and brother will get to have that emotional meeting with a 36-year-old woman almost half a world away who give the boy a new chance at life.

Julia Runge, the DKMS representative corresponding with the Crousers, said in an email that Borck (left) made the decision to become a bone marrow donor in 2007 after she read an article in a local newspaper about a young boy who suffered from leukemia and needed a stem cell donation. It was years before her chance to help another would come.

While taking injections to prepare for the bone marrow extraction, Borck experienced flu-like symptoms, muscle aches and fatigue. But, as Runge wrote, "Ines says, 'It was worth it, because I could save a life.' "

Borck told Runge she was emotionally touched by Tristen's story because it could have happened to her own son. Ironically, her husband was diagnosed with cancer after her bone marrow donation and continues to fight the disease.

While awaiting the big trip, Tristen attends fourth grade at Chester Morrison Elementary School three days a week and does what most young boys do. Monique said he will not be considered in remission until the five-year mark next January, and his hair lost during all those medical treatments probably won't grow back. He has scarring on his body and is legally blind in his right eye.

In addition, Tristen receives home visits twice a month from a private nurse and has blood treatments at least twice a month at City of Hope. He takes 28 types of medications each day. But for the Crousers, life is good.

When Tristen was asked about his years of illness, he looked at the floor and whispered, "I want to forget about it." He prefers to focus on the happy things in life: his family, his two dogs, ribbons wons horseback riding, his guinea pig and fish, and of course his bike and quad.

"We're a bike family," he said with a smile.

After what they have gone through, the Crousers are much more than that.

For information about registering to become a bone marrow donor, visit the DKMS website here.